Louise Linton Apologizes For Being Awful, Remains Adorably Out of Touch
If you’re like most Americans, you never heard the name Louise Linton before yesterday.
Just 48 hours ago the Scottish actress’ claims to fame were appearing in the 2012 remake of the horror film Cabin Fever and marrying US Treasury Secretary Steve Mnuchin both revolting undertakings that no doubt tested the limits of Ms. Linton’s gag reflex.
Now, however, Louise has finally found the fame she’s spent her adult life in search of.
Unfortunately, it’s left her frantically switching her social media accounts to “private” like Marie Antoinette boarding up the windows at Versailles.
In case you missed Louise’s “let them eat cake” moment, here’s what happened:
Linton and her husband … recently traveled to Kentucky in a private jet in order to discuss tax reform with Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell.
What former former Charlie Sheen co-starrer Louise brought to the table is anyone’s guess, but hey, this is the administration in which former handbag designers are shaping foreign policy, so anything goes.
Anyway, Woman of the People Louise posted a photo of herself arriving in Kentucky (a state in which 1 in 5 people live below the poverty line) that rubbed some folks the the wrong way.
The pic showed Linton stepping off a government plane looking like she’d been outfitted for a different kind of runway.
To ensure none of the poors got the wrong impression that she’s flying around in Target pajama pants and a neck pillow from Hudson News, Linton tagged the many high-end designers responsible for her outfit.
The hashtag “#HermesScarf” went viral shortly thereafter, but not because Twitter was so impressed by Louise’s fashion sense.
To drive home the point that she’s some sort of cartoon bad guy rich person, a la Monty Burns or Cruella De Ville, Linton attacked an Oregon mother of three who dared to suggest that her post was in poor taste.
“Have you given more to the economy than me and my husband? Either as an individual earner in taxes OR in self sacrifice to your country?” Linton wrote, in an emoji-laden screed.
“I’m pretty sure we paid more taxes toward our day ‘trip’ than you did. Pretty sure the amount we sacrifice per year is a lot more than you’d be willing to sacrifice if the choice was yours.”
She went on to slam Miller for being “adorably out of touch,” before sarcastically quipping, “Your kids look very cute. Your life looks cute.”
After what we imagine was a hilariously WTF?! reaction from her husband (who, as the producer of the Entourage movie, is a man who knows good taste), Louise issues a half-assed apology … through her publicist:
“I apologize for my post on social media yesterday as well as my response. It was inappropriate and highly insensitive,” read a statement issued by Linton’s handlers.
As you can see, the apology is boring, boilerplate, and almost certainly not penned by Louise hereself.
Really, the only reason we’re reporting on it at all is so that we can bring you the exciting news that Louise literally played Marie Antoinette in an episode of CSI: NY!
But that wasn’t her only gloriously apt film role.
Louise also had a few lines on the now-defunct of Cold Case.
She played a woman named Louise in an episode titled WASP!
You can’t make this stuff up, folks.
Well, you can … but who would want to?
Oh, do yourself a favor and google Louise’s memoir – a harrowing account of her post-boarding school gap year living amongst black people.
It’s the “feel awful about the world we live” in book of the year!